Politically Correct Alphabet
From "A More Enlightened Time (More Politically Correct Fairy Tales)" by James Finn Garner. I did not get permission to post this so I suggest you go buy the book (it is quite good). Also, I did not copy this from the book, but was sent it through email. If you are James Finn Garner and are reading this and would like for me to remove it, then lemme know and I will.
A is an activist itching to fight.
B is a beast with its animal rights.
C was a cripple (now differently abled).
D is a Drunk who is "liquor-enabled."
E is an Ecologist who saves spotted owls.
F was a Forrester, now staffing McDonald's.
G is a Glutton who says he's "food-centered."
H is a Hermaphrodite skirting problems of gender.
I is an "Ism" (you'd better believe it).
J is a Jingoist - love it or leave it!
K is a Kettle the pot can't call black.
L is a Lifestyle not bound to the pack.
M is a Mindset with bias galore.
N was a Negro, but not anymore.
O is an Oppressor, devoid of self-love.
P is the Patriarchy (see "O" above).
Q is a Quip that costs someone a job.
R is the Reasoning done by a mob.
S is a Sexist, that slobbering menace.
T is a Teapot that's brewing a tempest.
U is for Umbrage at the slightest transgression.
V is a Valentine, tool of oppression.
W is for "Woman," however it's spelled.
X is a chromosome we share in our cells.
Y is a Yogi for the easily led.
Z is a Zombie, the differently dead.
Submitted By: Anonymous
Aug 14, 1998 10:44