Reasons I Should Have Stayed Single
- Cooking my own meals would be an adventure, not a punishment.
- I wouldnt have to explain why I'm wearing "that" shirt with "those" pants.
- I could leave the toilet seat in any position I damn well please.
- I could actually tell the bartender, "If anyone calls, I'm here".
- I'd be painting the town instead of the house.
- I could show my girlfriend where I live.
- I'd be driving a miniskirt instead of a minivan.
- The only weeds I'd be concerned with are the ones I'm rolling.
- I would have saved $372,416.21 in groceries by now.
- I wouldnt catch so much grief about those skid-marks in my underwear!
Submitted By: Best of: Humor Mailing List
Sep 29, 1998 12:30