These are actual comments made on student's report cards by
teachers in the New York City public school system. All teachers were
reprimanded but boy, are these funny!!
- Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
- I would not allow this student to breed.
- Your child has delusions of adequacy.
- Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
- Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
- The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
- This child has been working with too much glue.
- When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
- The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
- If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
- It's impossible to believe that the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
- The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.