Classified Ad:

I have three peanut butter and jelly sandwiches I need to sell. Each has equal amounts of creamy JIF peanut butter and Grape jelly. All are on Roman Meal bread, and in glad sandwich baggies. These three sandwiches have NOT been properly refrigerated. Three days old. Am asking $1 each + shipping. Sorry, no COD, prepayment only. Also, I will trade for a timex sinclair, or a Commodore 64.

Reply:

Now before I buy I must know several things. Was the jelly mixed with the peanut butter prior to putting it on the one piece of bread? If so, was it placed with a methodical circular motion or just dabbed on there in a random senseless act of hurriedness. If the jelly was first placed on one piece of bread and the peanutbutter on the other with care I may go $.72 per sandwich. Is there a quantity discount, as I am a college student and may need more of these in larger quantities as the semester goes on. If these are not smashed I am willing to pay an extra $0.01 per sandwich to have them smashed (saves space, saves the earth and all that). The jelly must not be that less fat or fat free crap, I want the really good stuff. What brand of Grape jelly? The brand of jelly could make my whole decision. I would prefer preserves over jelly. Personally I like Jalapenos jelly for breakfast. If I buy large quantities could I specify what flavors of jelly, peanut butter, and bread, I want? Now about the baggies, are these baggies the zip-lock kind( a must). I also require that they be the kind that change colors(hopefully more than one color) when zipped. I have not seen the new ones that are suppose to play music while zipping, if you got those I would pay $0.04 extra. Do you take large sums of cash through the US Postal system?

Counter Reply:

Was the jelly mixed with the peanut butter prior to putting it on the one piece of bread?
No, peanut buter on one slice, jelly on the other
If so, was it placed with a methodical circular motion or just dabbed on there in a random senseless act of hurriedness.
Lots of TLC for my PB&J's
Is there a quantity discount, as I am a college student and may need more of these in larger quantities as the semester goes on.
No, each of these is hand crafted, these are VERY special sanwiches
If these are not smashed I am willing to pay an extra $0.01 per sandwich to have them smashed(saves space, saves the earth and all that).
I will smash at no extra charge (the post office will do it for me)
The jelly must not be that less fat or fat free crap, I want the really good stuff.
Ohhhhhh no. Absolutely not low fat, they have SMUCKERS brand grape jelly
What brand of Grape jelly?
SMUCKERS
If I buy large quantities could I specify what flavors of jelly, peanut butter, and bread, I want?
I only have grape and apricot. I think I also have a REALLY old jar of strawberry. Flavors of peanut butter? I have white, and wheat , and Roman Meal bread.
Now about the baggies, are these baggies the zip-lock kind (a must). I also require that they be the kind that change colors(hopefully more than one color) when zipped.
Ziplock indeed! I even drew a face on my finger before zipping (like on TV)
Do you take large sums of cash through the US Postal system?
Oh Yes indeed I do.

A note: Do not fall for any of those OTHER PB&J shops, they are fakes, and use FURRS brand jelly, and generic white bread.