The Top 20 Cool Things About A Car That Goes Faster Than The Speed Of Light
- Sleep 'til noon. Still get to work by 8:00am!
- Doppler shift makes red traffic lights look green.
- Breaking laws of physics only a misdemeanor in most states.
- Never in car long enough to hear an entire Madonna song.
- Carl Sagan and Stephen Hawking keep bugging you to carpool.
- No one can see you pick your nose while you drive.
- Lunch breaks in Paris, circa 1792.
- LA to Vegas in 2 nanoseconds.
- You can stop worrying about being sucked into a black hole driving home from work.
- You'll be so thin while driving it you can even wear horizontal stripes.
- That deer in your headlights is actually behind you.
- Kid from Mentos commercial almost guaranteed to lose a limb if he tries to duck through back seat.
- Traffic enforcement limited to cops with PhD's in Quantum Physics.
- Bugs never see you comin'.
- You can get to the good hookers before Charlie Sheen.
- Can make a fortune delivering pizza with the slogan "It's there before you order or it's free!"
- Car makes it from Hollywood to London fast enough to not arouse suspicions of Elizabeth Hurley.
- License plate: "Me=mc2"
- Cigarette butts don't land in the backseat -- they land in last week!
- Chicks dig it.
Submitted By: Anonymous
May 29, 1998 13:25