While in Italy, I did not speak Italian and most people didn't speak much English, so I had a lot of time to ponder.

Here are some of the things that crossed my mind:

1. When a young child speaks in a foreign language, it sounds like baby talk.
2. Garlic makes me fart.
3. No matter your size, your index finger is always a perfect fit for your nostril (Someone with big hands will have big nostrils, etc).
4. Find any 3 people who speak "a little" English and between the two fo them, they can form a complete sentence.
5. Sometimes I wish that I were small enough that people would just pick me up and carry me.
6. Drinking is an American hobby.
7. It makes you just a little nervous when the airline refers to a 747 as "equipment"
8. Eating Italian is like Marathon running; be sure to pace yourself.
9. When speaking to someone who speaks only Italian (no English), speaking broken English and adding the letter "O" to the end of your words won't help.

   The rest of these, didn't come from my trip. They are just evidence that I should never be left alone to think....

10. How can a "tree-hugger" be a vegetarian?
11. Opposable thumbs, we have. Why not opposable big toes?
12. Everyone loves to have his tummy rubbed.
13. Contacts are the hardest thing in the world to find if you lose them.
14. Eating hemp brownies creates a never-ending cycle.
15. The hardest part of having to take Ritalin is remembering to take it.